Lessons from breastfeeding class

I just finished watching a breastfeeding DVD, as that’s one of the aspects of baby care I know the least about but have an interest in doing. I’ve heard it’s so good for the baby as far as nutrients go, and also that it saves mucho on the cost of a baby. I’ve also heard that for some moms it just doesn’t work.

Breastfeeding is sort of a weird topic. It’s very comfortable for new moms to talk about, but other than that most people are a bit uncomfortable. People try to pretend it’s a topic they’re okay with, but feel just a little strange—after all, it’s boobs we’re talking about here. Boobs and sucking. (If you weren’t uncomfortable with the topic before, I bet you are now!) Seriously, though. Not the next thing I want to talk to my dad about.

New moms, though, they’ll go to town with the topic. Some of the best new mom stories I’ve heard begin with “I leaked once when…” or “I was so full of milk I had to…” These stories, although not funny at all at the time, I’m sure, are always great for a new mom laugh months later. In fact, if the whole breastfeeding thing works out for me, I hope to have some embarrassing boob milk stories for the blog in the future.

Anyhow, I learned a few things from this breastfeeding DVD I watched that I thought were interesting:

  • You can wake a sleeping baby! If you’re trying to keep the baby on an every 2-3 hours schedule like the DVD recommends, especially in the first few weeks, you’ll have to wake the baby up to make that happen. It sounds like it’s a “good luck” thing with some babies, though, as they are really tired and love their sleep the first week or so. Good luck waking them!
  • You may have noticed babies all have the same nose. Now you can know a reason, according to the DVD: babies noses all are pug noses so they can’t be smothered by mom’s boobs when breastfeeding. The nose tilts up so they can breathe!
  • A lesson I gathered on my own from the DVD: Like on Seinfeld, there’s good naked and bad naked. Breastfeeding is bad naked. Really! The instructor on this DVD was fully clothed using a doll to demonstrate positions to hold the baby in. I got what she meant, but for some reason the DVD editors felt the need to cut to Boobs McGee or Booby McBooberson to demonstrate as well. Trust me on this formula: boobie closeup + attached baby = bad naked.
  • Last, breastfeeding is hard work! I still hope to make it happen, but I know a little more about how much of a commitment it’s going to take. Wish me good boobie milk luck (or not, as that is an awkward phrase even as I type it)!

13 Responses to “Lessons from breastfeeding class”

  1. 1 Danielle September 3, 2009 at 8:35 pm

    The title alone had me… I do recall a few of these breastfeeding stories that you speak of from Susie’s shower 🙂

  2. 2 Mary HB September 3, 2009 at 8:45 pm

    Wow. It’s a good thing I’m not lactating. I laughed so hard at this post I would have squirted milk across the room…

    Um… is that inappropriate? Whatever, you’re hilarious. Good luck!

  3. 3 mollieott September 3, 2009 at 8:52 pm

    Danielle, yep, you’re right, that’s what I was thinking of! And Mary, you are hilarious, I just laughed so hard reading your comment. Glad the ducts aren’t working yet for me!

  4. 4 Jane September 3, 2009 at 9:10 pm

    oh mollie……

  5. 5 Auntie Deb September 4, 2009 at 8:31 am

    I’m not a “la leche” nut and think the baby will do just fine either way. Commenting on your last point, however, I would say that I think it’s actually easier than bottles (after the initial adjustment). I say this as a basically lazy person 🙂

  6. 6 Auntie Liz September 4, 2009 at 10:08 am

    I laughed so hard at your post… then I laughed just as hard at Mary’s comment.

    I think my favorite line was “after all, it’s boobs we’re talking about here. Boobs and sucking.”

    Coming in at a close second was “Trust me on this formula: boobie closeup + attached baby = bad naked.”

  7. 7 Mama May September 4, 2009 at 11:24 am

    All I have to add is my memory of attempting to breast feed first of three girls. (who could that be?) I did everything anyone recommended as I wanted to do this so badly–even ate chocolate bars all day at the advice of an elder neighbor. Did nothing but put on weight! Just relax and feed Wally V on his (or your) schedule!!!!

  8. 8 Mary HB September 4, 2009 at 12:13 pm

    My mom also says breastfeeding is ultimately the lazy way, too. You’ll never forget to pack your boobs when you go somewhere!

    Um. That was definitely crossing the line. I’m so done.

    But have you noticed only women are commenting on this one?

  9. 9 Auntie Deb September 4, 2009 at 1:28 pm

    Yeah! I’m still waiting for Wally III’s input!

  10. 10 Auntie Liz September 4, 2009 at 1:46 pm

    You’re on a roll Mary!!

  11. 11 Coach September 6, 2009 at 8:57 am

    I would like to be the first male to comment on this blog. But where do I start? Being a man child leaves me with no boob feeding stories other than my kids and now Grady bird trying to grab a manboob if you hold them a certain way. That is why it is so important for guys to always wear a shirt when holding babies. It could be most embarassing especially for you body builder types. But other than that it’s hard to relate a good boob feeding story and it also makes me feel kind of like a guy walking into a babyshower by mistake. My only real experience with breastfeeding was about 56 years ago when I was on the receiving end and alas I am so old I can’t remember that far back. But that gets me to thinking that perhaps that is why I like mountain biking so much. It could be a freudian thing with sucking water out of that Camelback. I better not put milk in that thing or I could revert back to wetting myself.
    But now think about it Mols, did Cavewomen have a DVD back in the caves?
    Did the Vikingesses have DVD’s back in their time? No, Mom or their best bud just said this is how you do it and don’t do it around the campfire when the Warriors are telling their stories and drinking Grog. It’s a perfectly natural thing. Just tell SmalWal to “Reach to the sky for a natural high”.

  12. 12 Barb Ottenhoff September 8, 2009 at 1:01 pm

    Oh Boy leave it to my son to leave a comment like that, and he’s my pride and joy??????

  13. 13 Mary HB September 9, 2009 at 11:06 am

    Coach, you never disappoint.

    I would argue that this blog is the 21st century equivalent to the campfire. Lookit! All the women are chit-chatting about what to do! And we’re all over the place! That’s neat.

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